Time is of the essence

As you can see it's been a few weeks since I've been able to post. I probably could find more time to post if I spent less time on Facebook...

I finally starts Sadie's scrapbook and I'm really happy with how it's turning out. I haven't made a scrapbook in years, but the creativity involved is starting to come back to me. I'm hoping to hit up Michael's Crafts and the dollar store this week or next to get some more cheap stickers.

I'm getting more and more apprehensive for school to start. I slept horribly last night and I think my anxiety is to blame. We're still trying to work out who will watch Sadie; we have some semblance of a schedule... but it still needs a lot of work. I'm hoping that by the end of the week we have everything ironed out. I'm having the worst separation anxiety so I'm hoping to ease that a little by leaving Sadie at my mom's house on Friday night. That's a HUGE step for me as I haven't really left Sadie with anyone for very long. It would be for over 12 hours, which freaks me out. I'm worried that Sadie will miss me; I'm worried more about how much I'm going to miss her. It's making me upset just thinking about it. But I need to get over this, because work starts up again next week. I'm so worried about what I'm going to miss when I'm at work. All of the smiles, laughs, actions, eventually words... what firsts am I going to be absent for?

Well, that's all for now. Time to go spend time with little Sadie Bug. :)

Let's try this again

So I'm entering the world of blogging once again. I'm unsure what I want to accomplish with this, but I do want a place to chronicle my life as a new mommy as well as a place to jot down my thoughts.

Being a mom is a lot harder than I ever imagined. It's not only an up-at-dawn job; it's an up-at-every-other-hour-with-a-very-hungry-baby. But it's also very rewarding. I've never known a love like how I love my daughter. It's amazing to wake up from a bad dream and be able to hug her, which was the case this morning. I had pretty much my first scary dream about Sadie. And it was the more reassuring thing this morning to wake up and hold her close.

Today is a big day for me as it's the first time I'm leaving Sadie with someone. It'll only be for a couple of hours, but it's a milestone as I've only ever left her once, and that was with Greg. Today she'll be visiting Jamie while I go to the dentist. I'm hoping this will help reduce my separation anxiety, as school starts in less than a month and I will be without Sadie all day long. I'm feeling incredibly apprehensive about this. Yet, I don't want to give up my job. So, now I have to find a balance between both being a mom and having a job. Every time I think about returning to school, the Clash lyrics (Should I stay or should I go?) pop into my head and I begin the never-ending loop of second-guessing my decision to continue to work.

Time to end this as Sadie has finished her nap. She certainly rules the house now!